A bit of winter introspection

I've always been very introspective. I think it has something to do with my brain that never stops thinking a million miles a minute and the fact that I am very critical of myself. I've always been driven, and sought out things that would aid my personal development, and been quite aware of where I'm at, and what I'm feeling at any given moment. That and I like to write and record. These traits naturally complement 'introspection' or the examination or observation of one's own mental and emotional processes.

There are a few times of year where introspection seems to creep up a bit more overtly than others. Making its way from the back of my ever playing mental tape to the forefront. Commanding solitude and time dedicated simply to reflection, introspection and thought as the main event. September, marked for years as a fresh start, a new school year, new challenges and new beginnings. And December marked by cold and crisp icy mornings, the ability to see your breath as the street crunches beneath your feet and you gather with friends and family to welcome a new year and say goodbye to the past.

So here I am, being introspective and reflecting on the year I’ve had. The year we’ve all had. I’ve heard from friends, from family, from strangers that 2014 was a particularly rough year. An unhealthy and unsupportive work environment saw me change jobs and enter a new field in May, to be followed by a stressful and all time consuming municipal campaign to which I devoted my every waking moment and squeezed every last drop of energy into. Coming off the campaign to an unstable political environment saw me forced to assume a new position in a new part of the province that will test my skills, patience and perseverance. The sudden unexpected death of my great-uncle, my partner’s brother being diagnosed with cancer, addictions issues effecting family members added to the stress of an already heavy and stressful years full of change. Buying a house with my siblings and the help of my late grandfather who left us money to invest, moving in with my brothers and my partner, getting a dog (Mikko), and feeling torn between where I am now and where I want and need to go.

This year has been heavy, and its been hard. But in heavy moments where it feels as though I’ll be crushed by the sheer weight of it I often feel the most strength because (even though I must remind myself) I have yet to be buried alive. Time and time again, I step up with the weight on my shoulders and figure out how to take steps to reducing the weight, and I continue to take steps (sometimes tiny steps) until it feels less heavy and I can see that it’s going to be okay, and that I’ve proven myself again to be perseverant, determined, and that nothing can crush my will for too long.

My little sister, Sierra (18), is currently in France working as an au pair for a family that lives on a ski hill and runs the restaurant. She left last week but is having a tough time dealing with homesickness, missing family, and battling with thoughts that she is not strong enough to tackle the challenge she has chosen for herself. I see a lot of myself in her. She took a chance (as I often do) to thrust herself abruptly into the unknown. Got swept up in the excitement of the change, the challenge, the adventure and barrelled on ahead full speed. Now, in quiet moments, she finds herself wondering “what the hell am I doing?”

I can’t help but remember feeling the same way when I was on the last flight into Tegucigalpa for in 2010. It sunk in as to what I was about to do. Live in a foreign place where I didn’t speak the language, a place I was told was dangerous, and work with an NGO that I knew nothing about and knew no one. I would have to learn a language, find a place to live, develop relationships, make friends, conduct research, and do it completely alone. Surely I must be out of my mind, or have seriously overestimated my own abilities. I felt suspended in freefall. My breath catching in my throat and forming a lump in the bottom of my stomach. But we know how it worked out. I learned Spanish. I found a place to live with a family I grew to love. I made friends, developed relationships, completed research and helped the NGO develop a program to engage youth which I then delivered. I went out on my own and took buses, and ferries, and hoped on the back of mopeds and saw the country. I visited friends in El Salvador and tried my hand at surfing. In fact, 4 years ago today I was on a bus headed to Santa Rosa de Copan to see a new part of the country, welcomed by a new friend and her family.

Some days, it feels as though the “Delaney” who had the guts and the confidence to embark on that type of adventure is a different person. That if tasked with the same thing today I would be unable to deliver. But I know that’s untrue. I know that whatever the obstacle, the challenge, the upset, or the adventure I will approach it the same way. Figuring out what I need to do, what needs to get done, taking it apart, and making sure it happens. By playing to my strengths, by giving myself time and allowing myself to feel weak and sad, but reminding myself of my proven track record of strength, determination and courage.

I know my sister will figure out, in her own way in her own time, how to do just that because I see that in her as well, even if she doesn’t. Learning about ourselves, being honest with ourselves, and pushing ourselves to do better and be better is one of the best gifts we can give ourselves. A gift that sometimes hurts more than we’d like it to as it can only be found in moments of discomfort and isolation, but a gift that we should cherish none the less.


In reflection,
Delaney C.

Women In Power, Women in Politics

Last night I went to an event called ‘Women in Power.’ I wasn’t sure what to expect outside of knowing that there would be wine (yey), some presenters, and that it was a political event. I arrived, talked with some women who shared their experiences, and my confusion as to why we were there. When the presenters started it became clear that we were there so that we could be encouraged or groomed into entering politics in some way, and that the need for more committed, dedicated women who were willing to take the chance and run for office (at any level) is huge. Not shocking to me, knowing that women are severely underrepresented in all levels of politics even though we make up of a little more than half of the population. I’m still confused as to how I ended up on the guest list, but I am going to take it as a sign, that I need to get more involved, which is something that I have been entertaining for a while.

The first presenter was Minister Theresa Oswald and as she was speaking, about her own experience, and experiences that many women in positions of power, in politics, experience, it seemed a bit like a stand-up comedy bit. When she detailed the challenge of juggling many roles, of being late as you drop your kids off at school having stayed up late baking a perfect batch of cookies for their bake sale, while on the phone to ensure your parents’ home care has been arranged and they are being looked after, while trying to at the same time ensure that your constituents are represented and the budget you are trying to pass is a strong one, while having to work harder, show up before and stay later then your male counterpart, go home and run a household, raise your children, and maybe if there is time afterwards and you aren't too tired, have sex with your husband laughter erupted. She discussed her first experience with politics began when she was dating the then Minster of Education, and had the thought “I don’t want to be sleeping with the Minister of Education; I want to BE the Minister of Education.” Much to my amusement she also mentioned the importance of comfortable footwear and the absurdity of wearing heels which are a form of footwear I have sworn off forever.

For me, it wasn't funny, although I can understand her intention was to keep the conversation lighthearted. It was soul crushingly depressing. Because it's not funny, it's not comical. For me, that's the reality that I will face if I want to be successful outside of my home, if I want, one day to enter into politics...and who do I have to look up to? The statistics are depressing and the female role models are few and far between because the barriers for women to enter into the political realm are vast and they are steep.

One women I spoke of, who is an entrepreneur and single mother said that after fighting all day, to be heard, to be acknowledged, to grow her business and take care of her family she fights tooth and nail and that she is too tired to attend additional committee meetings, or task forces and just does not have the energy at the end of the day to focus on the bigger picture. Another woman explained that when she had started teaching in the 1970s her colleagues had to resign if they got pregnant, and would need to re-apply and hope they got hired back if they were to take any type of leave. Theresa Oswald spoke of being the first female sitting cabinet minister to become pregnant and no maternity leave policy being in place. I thought of my own experience and even though my father was helpful, understanding and an active feminist, my mom was still alone. My mother still had to fill in the gaps, have her pension and her career suffer, give up her individuality and independence and in turn was titled ‘mother.’ I want more than that. I don’t want to ever stop being Delaney in order to be a mother. I don’t want my title to be so simply reduced to one word that replaces everything else that I have worked up to that point for, while my partner (if there is one) is able to hold on to all of his titles, attributes, and accomplishments while adding one more badge of pride, ‘Dad.’

I shared stories of the covert sexism and misogyny that I had faced in University while participating in student politics. Talked about we are subconsciously taught to behave and think a certain way from the day we are born, and how over the last few years I had been un-learning, un-packing, and re-learning some of the messages so engrained. Why is it necessary to sit back and wait for my partner to propose to me in order to enter into a new chapter of our commitment together? Does it not make more sense that it is a conversation we are both involved in, both participate in and agree to. It seems to that conversation (or lack of) can and will set the tone for our marriage if there is to be one.

In speaking with my partner after returning home, who is by the way caring, compassionate, and generally very understanding of some of the struggles and frustrations I face, but still privileged in that he is a man and will never have to endure some of the treatment that I have, asked what some of the speakers identified as barriers for women entering politics. I told him that I didn’t need a political speaker to spell the barriers out to me. I knew. I know. I know what prevents women from getting involved an engaged in politics, in positions of power. Because I’ve felt them, and experienced them first hand, and every time I do, it’s a reminder that there is no gender equality. That I may have the right to vote, wear pants and work outside of the home, but that every damn day I have to fight to show up and be heard. Have to fight harder, longer, and more eloquently to be valued and respected. Have to make less mistakes, be more sure of myself, and that even so, my physical appearance and how well I take care of my family and my home will always be more valued then my ideas, my opinions and what I have accomplished professionally. That my brothers, and my partner will be respected and valued simply by being present, but that more will always be expected of me because I have boobs.

It’s bleak out there. It’s going to be, and is tough. It’s a man’s world and that is a fact. But that doesn’t mean that I can’t connect with other like-minded women, that I can’t continue to challenge my own ideas and understandings, and that I can’t continue to show up and fight every day so that maybe one day a girl will be able entertain the idea of a political career and have plenty of role models to choose from.

Fighting back,
Delaney C

Connection is the true state of being

It seems that whenever I need, as in really really need a message, a sign from something greater than I, bigger then me...well, there it is.

I spent yesterday morning wandering around downtown Winnipeg, weaving in and out of streets with no real destination. Just needing to focus on placing one foot in front of the other. One foot. Then the other. Repeat. Repeat. The crisp air made my cheeks rosy but kept my head clear. When thoughts would creep in I pushed them out "Whoosh". Focusing on one foot. Left. Then right. Left. Right. And that was exactly what I needed.

I spent the evening thinking, sleeping, and dazed. And I think that's what I needed as well. I kept coming back to, "what's the point?" Why get close to people, develop relationships with people, if this is the kind of pain you feel when they are no longer there. Why? I thought about locking up all my loved ones, my nearest and dearest, in a room so that they couldn't get hurt. So I wouldn't have to hurt. I thought about cutting ties with everyone I know and love so that I never have to go through this again, and so they don't have to go through it if I were to get hurt, or die.

This morning I went to CrossFit and got a little bit of perspective. I was humbled by how far I have come, and how much further I have to go. Gasping for air putting one foot in front of the other, huffing and puffing, not letting myself stop or give up but still struggling the entire time. Nothing like getting physically destroyed to give you a little perspective and feel relatively small and insignificant.

When I got back to my apartment I turned on the radio and heard "Connection is the true state of being." As though Jian was speaking only to me. "We might not always remember that. We may feel powerless in the face of a world of problems but really we need to give our share to humanity the awareness the attention it deserves in order to start seeing things clearly. Surely that is the least we can do." And that was exactly what I needed to hear, was exactly the sign I needed to make today a new day. To get to work and put one foot in front of the other, again and again, until today is tomorrow. And until this gets easier.

Life is hard. It's tough. In one moment you can have all the air pulled out of your lungs, scared to take another breath, feeling like the stars are falling down all around you. When people leave us it reminds us of the horribleness that exists in every day. It reminds us that life is fleeting and short, which is something we don't always like to admit. It reminds us of all the times we've said angry words out of desperation and frustration and all the days in which we haven't laughed, or loved with our full and open hearts. And that is a sobering feeling.

But life is also stunningly beautiful and marvelous. It truly is an amazing experience sharing the world, sharing your life with others whom you grow to know, connect with, and who become a part of your life. I do have many wonderful, inspiring, and amazing people in my life and as Jian reminded me "connection is the true state of being." It's why we find so much satisfaction in our lives, in our jobs, in our relationships...all that connecting. Feeling as though you are a part of something, being aware, and attentive, and giving it all we've got. Life is much more beautiful, meaningful and satisfying when its shared. And that's why I can't get rid of all the people I care for, can't ask them to live in a box so that I never have to feel loss or pain again. Because we are made to connect. To share our lives, and our love with each other.

It will be hard. I'm scared. I'm worried. For my friends and family that are also feeling this loss. But I know that it will get easier, whether we want it to or not. Our hearts will heal. We will have each other. As long as we keep moving our feet, one after another. Left, right, left right.



With an open heart,
Delaney C.

Gratitude (with intention)

Like my most recent post on Volunteerim this post has been in my Drafts section collecting cobwebs and dust for quite some time and events of the day have inspired me to finish it and also provided some very useful self reflection.

It is finals time for students attending post -secondary education (PSE), which means my Facebook, and Twitter has been riddled with students venting their frustrations and expressing their excitement for the “freedom” that awaits in the future if only they can get past the “torture” of studying and exams. Reading the status updates stating “10 days until Freedom,” “Can’t wait until this torture is over,” “3 exams until Freedom” and many others didn’t sit well with me. I mulled it over and decided to post my own food for thought trying to aptly articulate my frustration with the lack of gratitude with having the ability to pursued PSE. I posted:

“Why are people complaining about how exams are impeding their "freedom"? Yes, studying and exams are stressful, but obtaining a post-secondary education is a choice (and an investment in your future) that you (or your parents) pay to be able to participate in, and an opportunity that many are not fortunate to have. Unless your professors are locking you in cages or taking away your ability to speak or think...then maybe, just maybe your "freedom" is in question. The fact that you have the ability to pursue a post-secondary education in something that you have chosen is in itself something to be grateful for.”

What then occurred is an interesting experiment of sorts in social media, as well as an opportunity for me to reflect on my own personal approach and strategies that I employ to get messages which I am passionate about across to others. In a short half hour my post, which I did not foresee to be overly contentious received a significant amount of attention resulting in 70 “likes” and several wide-ranging comments. Some echoed my sentiment with the and some encouraged more discussion.

One commenter stated, “I get you. It's hard to argue that studying and / or paper-writing constitute true losses of freedom, when you spend any time at all around people who spend the better part of their days locked in a jail cell (more or less for the crime of being poor and racialized) BUT, I will say that I am guilty of making "freedom" comments sometimes, and I will say that I think there is a little more validity to them than you give credit for.

Freedom isn't the right word to use. Fair criticism, but when you spend years of your life, toiling away writing papers for profs who probably don't care if you learn anything, and go thousands of dollars into debt, only to discover that you can earn a higher wage working at a restaurant, than taking the research job the requires your degree; it's kind of hard to blame people if they don't always see their education as life greatest privilege.

Of course, this doesn't change the fact that education IS a privilege.”

To which I responded, “Ultimately whether you choose to pursue a post-secondary education or not is your choice. If you feel that your professors don't care if you learn anything and the debt you choose to go into as a result of pursuing education are other issues but at the end of the day you are making the choice to pursue a post-secondary education because it has value to you which outweighs those other things. Education is a privilege, but it shouldn’t be. Education should be a right that everyone regardless of background, socioeconomic status or life circumstances should have access to, but until that happens we need to be especially mindful that we have choices and options and comparing University exams to "torture" or loss of "freedom" trivializes those that do not have the opportunity to pursue an institutional education is something that they choose.

I have been a student for many years (and likely will be again) and I realize that its stressful, challenging, difficult, and frustrating but it is a choice, and not the only way to become educated (and also often doesn't result in a higher paying job depending on what you choose to study) but one that many people choose to participate in because they place value on it.”

I attempted to reiterate that my intent was not to shame students for their personal feelings and experiences in academia, but more so my intent was that sometimes we (myself included) need to be reminded of how lucky we are so that we can be grateful for the opportunities we do have rather than focus on how hard, frustrating, challenging or “tortuous’ it feels at the time. Gratitude is not something that comes easy or naturally and it is certainly not something I have mastered. It is something that I personally need to be reminded of every day, multiple times, and is also something that requires effort and a shift in perspective.

It’s easy to get caught up in the day to day and forget about what really matters to you. It’s easy to loose perspective. Its easy to lose sight of those things and focus on how awful it frustrating it feels to be stuck in traffic on the way to work, how difficult it feels to focus on writing a paper when you aren’t sure if your professor cares if you write it or not, and how disheartening it feels when you feel isolated, insignificant or alone.

We ended our “discussion” agreeing to disagree. With the content of my post and also with the methods that I employed to get my message across which gave me the opportunity for a lot of reflection. Reflection that will continue long after I publish this post. Reflection that will force me to confront what I said, what I could have said, and how I articulate my thoughts and present myself. I am always pushing myself to be better, to learn more, to hone skills that I place a priority on. To listen to others, to try to see how my actions, words and behaviours effect them, and then to think about how that in turn has an effect on me.

I am grateful that I have the opportunity to explore. To push myself. To grow and develop. I am grateful that I have had the opportunity to learn and grow both in and out of academic institutions and from talented and inspiring role models. I want to express gratitude for so much, for I have many things to be grateful for. Hopefully I will remember that tomorrow.

With intention,
Delaney C.

Volunteerism (as a life value)

This post has been a long time in the making events that took place yesterday have finally given me the 'push' I need to get my act together and write down some of my thoughts.

I've been thinking a lot about volunteering and volunteerism in the last few months as it has always been a very important part of my life. I work for a non-profit organization (Big Brothers and Big Sisters) that works with volunteers, matching them with mentees to provide 1:1 support, guidance and friendships for children who may not receive those things elsewhere. I am lucky to have found a job doing something I am so passionate about and really believe in and that keeps me learning and on my toes each and every day.

This summer I spent some time volunteering for various festivals in Winnipeg and had a great time participating in the Fringe Festival, Jazz Festival, and Kids Fest. For me getting involved in my local community, sharing things that I'm excited about, and being part of something have always been priorities. I've most recently got involved volunteering with the Elizabeth Fry Society of Manitoba and have been blown away by the variety of programing offered and how much I have enjoyed my two very different volunteer positions (Women for Change, and Recording Stories) which I will talk about in a future post.

Yesterday morning I had the opportunity to spend some time at Siloam Mission volunteering with a few of my co-workers at their breakfast drop-in program. We had decided that as the holiday season approaches instead of giving gifts we wanted to spend some time together getting involved in our local community. I shared my excitement on my Twitter account, and much to my surprise was asked to speak about my experience this morning on CJOB with Karen Black. Social media for the win! Go to 7:45am and you will be able to hear me speak with Karen Black from CJOB about volunteerism, and my experience with Siloam Mission. Why I Volunteer?

For me volunteering is all about connecting with other people on the basic human level. It’s about being a part of something, getting involved in my city and my local community, and giving back. It’s about recognizing that I am so blessed to have had the opportunities in my life to pursue my dreams, to think about what makes me happy and drives me, and to go for it, and about the gratitude I have for the world. I am always blown away by how many amazing organizations exist in my little city (let alone the rest of the world) and how much they depend on volunteers to do what they do, and I am always excited to become a part of it. Why Volunteer?

1) Meet likeminded people. I've mentioned it jokingly to some of my friends, but if I was not already in a committed, supportive and satisfying relationship with someone I am lucky enough to have in my life I would meet people volunteering. Meeting someone volunteering helps you figure out some of the stuff that you can’t if you're looking online, meeting at the bar, or through mutual friends. You'll have similar interests, similar values and as a bonus most volunteer organizations typically have some sort of screening process.
2) If you have a roof over your heard, can eat three meals a day, an education, and a caring support made up of friends and or family members you have a lot (A LOT) to be thankful for and happy about. Volunteering is a great way to ‘pay it forward.’
3) Its a low cost/no cost way to spend time with your loved ones and get engaged with an organization you care about.
4) It helps build a community of support and pride within the city/community/neighbourhood/world that you live in.
5) Growth and learning. Develop your personal ability to be a leader, develop new skills and fine tune the skill set you already have, receive training and guidance, develop interpersonal skills be a part of a team, build confidence, and put your passion in to practice.

And it’s FUN! I could go on and on...and on...and on about how influential volunteering has been in my life, about all of the lessons and values I have been able to take away, about how empowered I feel, how I have been able to get practical experience developing my skills and about how I have met so many inspiring and powerful role models over the years both here in Winnipeg, across Canada, and across the world but perhaps I will save that for another post.

I'll be so bold to say that if you give yourself 6 weeks to commit fully to an organization that you are interested in you will not be disappointed. Volunteering has a way of getting under your skin, into your blood, and once you start I doubt you'll be able to stop :) Often all it takes is 1 hour a week, which we all have!

If your interest is working with children, the environment, the immigrant population, animals, policy based or hands on, local, or global the opportunity (and the need) is there to get involved.



I'm rooting for you Winnipeg,
Delaney C.



Here are the links to some of the organizations currently close to my heart:

http://www.bigwinnipeg.com/en/Home/default.aspx
http://www.efsmanitoba.org/
http://www.siloam.ca
http://www.lutheranworld.org/lwf(Honduras and El Salvador)
http://www.rdrsbangla.net
Environmental Movement of Olancho (MAO) (Honduras)
http://unitedwaywinnipeg.ca/

Tug-of-War

There is a German word, Fernweh, which means "crave for travel; being homesick for a place you've never been." What a beautiful word that so accurately describes how I find myself feeling more often than not these days, and have for the majority of my life.

Even as a young child I was inquisitive, thoughtful, always thinking and always imagining what was happening in other people lives, in other places, in other cultures, and how exciting it was to catch just a glimpse. I’ve been so lucky in my short 24 years to be able to have seen and experienced some of the things that I have. To have had the opportunities to travel to corners of the earth not plagued by mainstream tourism, to speak with locals about serious issues effecting their livelihoods, to work and collaborate with respected local organizations working with people in the area to change the future of their own countries, and to be able to focus on the moment at hand.

A year ago I decided that I would try something new. I would put down some roots, make some commitments, take some chances, not go anywhere for a while, and see what would happen. A grand experiment with my life so to speak. It’s been challenging, more challenging than I first expected to ‘stay put.” I find my mind wandering constantly, to the next adventure, to the next far away place, back to the places I’ve been, and the friend’s I’ve made.

I re-signed a lease on an apartment for the first time, meaning I’ve made a commitment to ‘stay put’ for at least another year, and while on one hand its comforting knowing that I have a place to lay my head, a stable long term job that I love, and a circle of friends that add so much my life I can’t help but feel that part of me (a very important part of me) lays dormant and in wait for the next time I can dust off my backpack and jump into the unknown.

I’m happiest when I am pushed out of my comfort zone. When I’m forced to try to make sense of what’s going on and have been given very little clues. I love the rush that comes from trying to figure out new surroundings, new people, trying new foods with names you can’t pronounce, overhearing new languages, new scents, and new environments.

I’ve been trying to keep busy in Winnipeg. Volunteering with community events (Jazz Festival, Fringe Festival) and community organizations (Elizabeth Fry Society) which has kept my monsters at bay as there is always something going on, something new to learn, and something new to see, however it hasn’t helped me find a balance, and I feel that as soon as I stop packing every day with excitement and high energy activity I’ll book a one way plane ticket to Istanbul and not look back (for at least 6 months anyways).

In the next year, I will become more comfortable with what is familiar. With what I know. With routine. I will work on finding a balance, on slowing down, on appreciating ‘down time.’ I will continue to actively participate in my community, to learn the finer nuances of my job, and to find ways to explore and adventure in my own back yard.



"If you learn to love, you might love life"
Delaney C

Kony2012 and the 'Social Media Activism' Boom

I'm happy that people are becoming aware of an issue. It might be a starting point, but before 'starting' anything, be critical, get the facts, make a thoughtful educated decision, and then do more than share a video that's gone viral, do more than put up posters or tell your friends, just do more. Explore more issues, and make sure that you're paying attention to what's happening in Canada, in our own country, and across the world as well, not just when its 'trending' but every day, because when the KONY2012 videos stop being posted it doesn't mean the situation is over, or the cause no longer worth while, it just means that people have gotten bored.

Like I said, I'm all up for people getting aware, getting involved, getting passionate, and wanting to make a difference. I would never shame someone for wanting to start, everyone has their own starting points after all, and I've been involved with some programs, and donated money to some agencies, that I would chose not to given the information and experience I have now. However sometimes 'starting' something without knowing all the facts can be extremely detrimental. I don't have a better answer, I don't have a solution. But just because I don't, doesn't mean that you should support KONY 2012 just because it's something else or something better. Something isn't always better than nothing. Sometimes it's worse.

I've debated the idea of 'social media activism' the importance of raising awareness and what amazing and popularized tools (twitter, tumblr, facebook, youtube, THE INTERNET) my generation has at our fingertips to be connected across the world instantly and how we typically use these amazing, and powerful tools to gossip about the Kardashian's, complain about having to work late, or follow the newest trends, and don't even come close to tapping into its full potential as a tool that can quite possibly change the world as we know it.

My friend Rayannah Kroeker summed up my feelings pretty well when she posted her comments on Facebook, the very place that this video http://vimeo.com/37119711 has exploded over the last two days, going viral and eliciting many different responses from my varied Facebook friends.

"I have never seen my newsfeed so covered with a social justice issue before. People care. People are learning about the LRA. And I know that those who are posting about KONY are doing it with good intentions. And those intentions give me hope.

I would love to feel that this campaign will lead to a Uganda where every person young or old can find opportunity, or better yet, create it.... I'd love to feel that this is going to drive real and lasting change.

But I don't.

Instead, I feel that this campaign is offering a simple feel-good solution to an extremely complicated and deep-rooted conflict. I am afraid that this solution may do more harm than good. I worry that people sitting at home on their computers have a greater say in what the solution should be than those who live in Uganda. I worry that the voices are being wrongly weighted. I worry that this sort of simple feel-good approach will dominate the way in which people participate in social justice.

I feel that this campaign is distracting. Distracting from the real challenges and progress going on in Uganda today. Distracting from other current atrocities whose propaganda machine is not so well oiled.

I feel this campaign is wasteful. From the mass production of propaganda materials which on April 21st will litter the streets of North-America, to the money of Invisible Children's revenue which is spent on its staff's salaries and travel expenses.

I feel. I feel. I feel. This campaign focuses on the way we feel and react to the horrific information presented to us in the film rather than truly trying to empathize with, represent and understand those enduring these horrors in Norther Uganda.

I feel that this campaign repeatedly shows us the face of an adorable five year old american boy and gives us only one Ugandan voice - a uni-dimensional victim.

I am glad people are being moved by the story of someone born half a world away. But does that story have to be sensationally exaggerated for us to pay attention? Do the facts have to be skewed? Does it have to be packaged with easy solutions? Does it have to come in HD? Does it have to make us feel as though we made a massive difference with nothing but the click of a button? Does it have to offer us a homogenous Africa(is not a country)? Does it have to be in storybook format with bad guys, heros and victims?"

I have no doubt that the people sharing this video, getting excited about social justice and making change have their hearts in the right place. It might be the first time that these people have been made aware of the atrocities going on in the world, and it is great that a dialogue has begun and that people are talking about it...but its not good enough. That's not the pessimist in me speaking, that's the realist. Its simply not enough to share a viral video, put up posters, donate your profile picture, or twitter feed.

Be critical, act with perseverance, realize that easy answers aren't always the best (if they were, we would solve a lot more global issues), be motivated, think outside and whatever you do.....ALWAYS learn two (both, all, as many as you can) sides of the story, it will help you make educated decisions, come up with more complete and holistic suggestions of solutions, act with innovation and think outside of the box.

I don't have the answers. I've made that clear, and I don't claim to have them. What I do have is questions, roughly a million of them, and an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. A hope that I'll be able to live in a place, in a world where people are aware and care about each other in their own countries and across the world. Where we use technology to connect the world and make positive social change rather than find out whose dating who in Hollywood. Where apathy is a thing of the past and where critical thought is not only encouraged but expected.

Two of my cents,
Delaney C.